Someone one’s said that Anger is the wind that blows off the light of the mind and i agree
Do you consider yourself to be temperamental? How often do you flip out on people cursing them out, throwing things, and putting up with words and actions that you later regret?
Do you believe when people tell you that that is just the way you are, you do not have a choice, or that you inherited such tendencies from your parents? There are all lies.
I was invited for a birthday party by a friend within our age bracket at the time (in my 20s). I was there chilling with my cousins and some ‘honies’ when another friend came from another table with a bottle of beer he was drinking. He poured the whole bottle on my head. In reaction i tried to stand up but he held me down saying ‘my friend sit down!’
I was confused and surprise; i couldn’t tell if he was joking or serious. I was soaked by the time he was done and when i realised he did it for sports i was furious. I wanted to smash his head with the bottle of drinks in front of me but something strange happened. I recalled a promise i made to myself when reading the book: “As a Man Thinketh – by James Allen“, and that immediately doused my temper. I simply stood up and asked him – Roy, why have you done this? I walked away afterwards.
Of course, the party ended before it began. The ladies felt unsafe and went away with their guys. I heard afterwards that the host vented his anger at him but they somehow managed it through.
I was home confused and mad. Voices in my head told me to go back and show him a piece of me, but another voice told me to let it go and keep to the promise i made to myself. It was a VERY difficult pill to swallow, especially as i was confident i could contain him in a fight and i was known to be a no nonsense guy. I felt like folks will be disappointed in me and that others could ride on that to pick on me subsequently. Trust me, it was painful. I ended up in tears. and slept off.
By the time i woke, i realised that i’d heal completely.
I met him a few days after while on a stroll with my Uncle Hawkins. My Uncle was aware of what happened and paused him to ask why he did what he did. His answer humbled me. He said his actions were simply borne of jealousy. ‘That i usually walked pass by where boys play Pool and hang out to drink and smoke but refuses to join them. That my actions portrayed i am being pompous and showing them that i belong in a higher class. This is why he did what he did to test where I ‘belong’ in terms of frat.”
I was stunned. It was then i recalled those that were at his table, the fraternity where ‘they belong’. It suddenly dawned on me that it was a setup to push me into action so that they could humble me. He apologised that he was drunk and regret his actions. I forgave him.
That experience has been with me since and perhaps will stay my whole life. My greatest lessons from this experience was the fact that i could control my anger.
The pause i took before action, the book i read, the promise i made to myself not to anger myself into a fight, and many others, played important role in helping me avoid what probable could have ended my life.
If i could and can control myself/anger, you can do it too.
How do you react when angry? When was the last time you where sparked to anger but you reacted with calmness?
Share how you handle anger below. We will be glad to share in your perspectives.
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